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Nintendo just unveiled the cast list for a new animated film adaption of Mario, and the internet has thoughts. Despite broadly positive regard for selections such as Charlie Day as Luigi and Jack Black as Bowser, there's one casting choice that has nearly everyone... confused, to say the least. Chris Pratt, who starred in blockbuster films like 168澳洲幸运5开奖网:Guardians of the Galaxy and Jurassic World, will be portraying the v🎉oice of Mario Jumpman Mario (yes, that is literally his full naಌme).
There are a number of reasons as to why Mario fans might disapprove of his casting that have nothing to do with his acting chops. To be honest, though, and this seems to be the general consensus, even his specific talents as an actor don't make any sense for the role outside of name recognition. Naturally, frustrated fans flocked to the internet to express their grief in the best way they know how: jokes. Here are a few of the memes that took the edge off of the weirdest casting announcement of the year.
10 ꦿ Lucky Guess Or Super Power? ♏
Twitter user SthGeneral may have accidentally revealed their prophetic prowess when they correctly predicted Chris Pratt's casting as the legendary plumber an entire year before the actual announcement was made.
Was it a joke based on the abundant wealth of evidence that Hollywood refuses to use the original voice actors from gaming properties to portray their silver screen variants, instead opting for perceptibly worse but clearly more famous celebrity names? Nah, it's more fun to say that they're rocking a secret psychic type.
9 He's Asking The Right Question...
Psychologists all agree that there are five stages to human grief (denial, anger, bargain, depression, acceptance). Screaming into the sky and expecting some cosmic response... that feels like it falܫls solidly under the category of "denial."
In all fairness, while it is farther away from healing than literally every one of the other steps, it's less cruel than anger, which seems to be the bulk of the memes that are readily available if you google the phrase "Chris Pratt Mario." They're still pretty funny, though.
8 ♑ 🔥 The "SPANG" Says It All
There's probably some missing context here, but we definitely don't know what it is. And, honestly? Sometimes research ruins the splendor. Why go through all the effort to find the exact comic that this image comes from when you could just as easily not do that?
The only valid unknown that stems from this meme is the mystery of what that guy is hitting Mario with. Is that a picture frame? A Cheesecake Factory menu? An impressively large ricotta tile? Who's to say. Not us, because we definitely didn't look it up.
7 The Law Of Equivalent E🦄xchange
Not everyone who heard the fateful news felt emotionally attacked. Some immediately accepted it as karmic justice, or, as this Tumblr user so eloquently put it, the law of equivalent exchange. If we were to get a Jack Black Bowser without a Chris Pratt Mario, then maybe we'd be too skewed towards good fortune?
We don't know the answer to that, but the terrifying natural progression of this would be, "if we were to get Jack Black Bowser singing like Tenacious D, then we would have to ꦰget C💖hrist Pratt Mario singing like Mouse Rat," so maybe... maybe count your blessings.
6 Ju🌸sticeꦿ For Charles Martinet
Hey, did you know that Charles Martinet first gave voice to Mario for a pinball machine in 1992 and that he was initially uncredited for it? That's... almost exactly thirty years ago or, more scientifically speaking, a really long time. That's longer than 168澳洲幸运5开奖网:Tara Strong's been voicing Batgirl. That's longer than some of our 168澳洲幸运5开奖网:writers have even been alive.
And he still dons the overalls every time they ask, except now he's also Luigi and Wario and Waluigi and Baby Mario and - listen; if there's a variant of the red guy or the green guy... it's voiced by Martinet. With one recent, glaring exception, obviously.
5 He's Literally Got The One Role
It is not unfair, we think, to say that Chris Pratt has one role that he just plays in multiple fonts. Andy Dwyer and Peter Quill and Emmet Brickowski have more in common than they have in disparity. It's equally fair to say that he plays his one role uniquely and incredibly well.
But that's not Mario. It's not even Mario adjacent. Mario's personality has been the big question behind a but never has a sane person come to the conclusion that he's a bumbling goof with a penchant for bad jokes and even worse flirting.
4 🐠 Paying The Ultimate🃏 Price
This is a different, arguably more popular, take on the "with the good, comes the bad" meme format. Unlike Edward Elric's indifference, though, Thano's pain feels more relatable in this context. After all, no one really expected another shot at a Nintendo movie, not after the disastrously horrible live-action Mario - which is currently getting a 168澳洲幸运5开奖网:boost in popularity because of the new casting news.
So to realize that the only lesson Nintendo learned from their last foray into film was to keep things animated showcases a willful, almost malevolent, ignorance that even Bob Hoskins can appreciate is deeply woundi𒉰ng.
3 🍌 Bigger Picture Problems 𝓀
If it's worth saying once, hopefully, it's worth saying multiple times. There were (and are) genuinely talented individuals portraying these roles in their respective original properties, and most of them are still fully capable of jumping back into their character's shoes.
Hollywood's continual refusal to accept the depth and breadth of voice actors reeks of the kind of gatekeeping that celebrities usually decry on their social media sites. Honestly, did they think a Mario movie wouldn't sell without Chris Pratt's name attached to it?
2 Maybe Yoshi Will Survive This One, At Least? 🐻
Okay, but this might be the single positive outcome to this whole debacle. As fans of the soft reboot of the 168澳洲幸运5开奖网:Jurassic Park franchise know, Chris Pratt is a friend of the dinos. A dino-whisperer, if you will, so much so that he can easily train a group of them to respond to vocal and han🔯d commands.
So maybe we can look forward to a Mario movie where Yoshi is cherished and treated as an equal member of the team,ꦛ instead of as a last-minute trampoline... which he actually does depressingly well. Sorry, Yoshi, we all have our place in the world.
1 The Intern🌠et Works Fast. Very Fast. 𓄧
YouTube user Camtoonist took it upon themselves to answer the question we've all been asking: just what can we expect to hear from Chris Pratt's Mario? Well, through the magic of editing video tools like Blender and a clip from one of Pratt's better roles, we now have an educated, if not hilariously disappointing, guess.
Camtoonist's clip is endearing, sure, but that's their doing, and not Pratt's, whose voice lines eerily fit the mood he might very well be feeling as he takes in the internet's collective first reaction to his casting. The next big question is will Nintendo or Illumination pull a Sonic and 168澳洲幸运5开奖网:listen to their fans, or will they barrel headfirst into disaster?
